A letter to my mom on her birthday
Happy Heavenly Birthday best friend, my twin, my angel…mommy! It’s hard to believe it’s been almost 9 years since you departed this Earth and that this is your 8th birthday I’m celebrating without you. As I write this letter I am filled with mixed emotions today as part of me is excited and anxious to meet my precious baby girl (and a little nervous too), part of me is happy to celebrate you, the amazing woman that you were and your life today and then part of me is sad and tearful because today is another reminder that you aren’t here so I miss you and wish you were here so I could celebrate with you.
As I prepare to bring your grandchild into the world any day now, I am overjoyed to know that she will carry out your name as her middle name and will share the same birthday month as you and her great aunt Joyce. This has truly been the light for me these past 9 months. I have to admit at times it can be tough thinking about doing this without you but in my heart I know that you are still with me and you have prepared me for this next journey.
I hope and pray that I am half as awesome of a mother to her as you were for me. I hope you will continue to send me little reminders every now and then to let me know you’re still here with me. And in the moments when I get overwhelmed or feel as if I don’t know what to do for Chriselle, I hope you will talk to me or send me a sign that everything is ok and help guide me in the right direction. Everyone was betting on today as her arrival date although I was never convinced. I have to admit that at times I felt like I was possibly being selfish because it wasn’t that I thought your birthday was a bad day and didn’t want her to share that with you but it was more because I didn’t know if emotionally I could take celebrating and missing you on August 11th while also celebrating one of life’s greatest blessings for me in the birth/birthday of my baby girl. As time got closer to today though, I gained a peace about it and it became more about you all just having the same birth month more than anything. Of course there are a few more hours left in the day that this could still happen but I’m not counting on it, lol.
I truly believe Chriselle is a gift from you to me and I am beyond excited to meet her and raise her. I wish she could meet you but I promise to tell her all about you, the things you did, the phenomenal woman that you were and show her plenty of pictures of you too. And, if she comes out looking like me then I’ll call her our triplet, since I look just like you, lol. As you were a true follower of Christ and woman of God it is my prayer that she will be the same as her name, Chriselle, means “follower of Christ.” I also pray she will have your beautiful spirit, strength, patience, caring heart for others and bring joy and leave a great lasting impression to everyone she comes in contact with, just like you did.
As I close, I want to thank you again for being the absolute best mother any daughter could wish for and for all of the wisdom, values and love you poured into me. You were truly one of a kind. Know that I miss you so much and think about you daily, I love you more than words could ever say and I am glad that I am your daughter. Thanks again for watching over me and for this special present you have sent my way that I can’t wait to meet soon. Happy Birthday mommy! I hope you and Aunt Joyce are having a great time up there celebrating your August birthday month.
Love always,
Your baby girl, Charita
